Very nice. Let's walk though my review of it? ^_^
I really like how you had the same character proportion (not varying in characters being too big, small, different drawing style) through out the comic, the speech bubbles seem to be "planned before" drawing the panels (except for page two; you drew the picture but "forgot" that you needed a speech bubble), and all the characters look so young and cute (you really want to adopt them!
.
On the negative side... You changed the text style three times (usually anything in
italics seem that the character is sounding sly, smooth talking, or something ;^^), the text is also too small at times (page 3 + 4; I totally skipped reading those panels), and even though the characters look young and cute, they don't follow the official character designs (some people get turned off if comic artists stray too far from the originals (year 2000 designs in this instance)).
Things that I want to note is that it looks like you used only soft and hard pencils. That's why it is so "dirty" looking. Try using pencils as only for rough drafts and using ink pins as finals. Be careful! Don't touch the ink while inking! That's worse than pencil smearing!
Over all, great job! I am glad you had the courage to even draw the comic. I will be looking forward to reading more from you (unless it's hentai or yaoi, then bye-bye ;^^). B)
